미국사람

Going abroad has taught me things that I never expected, exposed me to sights I never knew existed and has made me grow older than the usual few months would.

I have had my world turned upside down. Things that I thought were "common sense" are actually "American culture". Experiencing philosophies I've studied being applied has made me completely change many opinions I once held in high esteem. I have seen stereotypes and misconceptions from around the world be proven and disproved in a single night, and I have been accused of being "too American" when I try to fight for what I believe is right. I have learned who I am and where I belong, I have learned what I believe and why I study. I am living as a foreigner in a land far from home.... and yet I still don't manage to feel lost.

Amongst the anger, the shocks, the excitement, the disappointment, the nostalgia, the homesickness, and the knowledge and experiences, I have had no choice but realize where I am. Korea, an entire country smaller than my home state with more national pride than the US combined, has taken my mind by surprise. Through the half-truthful desires of peace, to the nearly unknown history ranging from Feudal times to foreign occupation to civil war to military dictatorship to corrupt democracy the country continues to feel a strong sense of national pride. A strong sense of Korean pride, that belongs to Koreans. A pride that I will never be fully accepted into, because, for the first time in my life, with one look people know I'm different... and they let you know through the constant

stares

at the amazement of a foreigner seemingly to have magically made it to their country.

But I digress.

The country is beautiful. It's beautiful and magical and has a history longer than I can properly wrap my brain around. I am seeing seasons I have not seen since I was a kid. Just today, it snowed-the first snow of the season-and it was very much a strange sight to see. At first, I wasn't quite sure what I was even seeing! There are hills everywhere, where I am, and it creates quite a nice background for walking around (although these days it's getting to cold to take a brisk walk).

So, in this note, I will not put the gruesome details of how strange things have gotten, how strange they've really gotten. This is just a small update to let some people into how life is generally going.

and to save this more abstract note from being too long

However, I will like to say, one of my professors is probably one of the most amazing people I will ever meet, and I didn't know how amazing he was until just yesterday. A brief rundown of his life thus far:

He was born in North Korea, and escaped during the war, which is impressive enough of a task in itself. Then, when South Korea became a military dictatorship, he decided to escape to America, where he got a job at a 7-Eleven cleaning the floors. Then, after working hard, he became a district manager in charge of many different stores, and he was told he had room to grow even higher in the business. But, he decided he wanted his own business, quit, and moved to Atlanta, Georgia... where he started his own business, and became a very successfully businessman. Then, he decided he wanted to go to school, he'd heard of a school in Boston, you may know it, Harvard. So, he sold his businesses, started school in Harvard, and started a new business in Boston. All the while he tells me, "I'm still very much Korean, so I really feel home here.." This is just a brief summery of a great discussion I had with a great man last night, and he seems to be more angry at this school than I.

Reminder

A friendly reminder to myself that I need to write something big.

A Clean Room

Without my school bag, I am ill prepared for a day of studying. So, I take the oppurtunity to clean up my surroundings. During this time I am reminded of a few things that I seem to have neglected in my overwhelmed existence.

I am in Korea.

Somehow, I seem to have forgotten that I am really in Korea. At least, temporarily. The pressure from classes, the miscommunication between schools, and most of all: the constant use of English. Not a day goes by that I do not hear English. Everyone in the world knows English and they use it as the common language amongst the otherwise unknown languages.

Now, taking the time to rethink my room, and thus, rethink how I was living everyday, I realized that I need to put my own personal efforts into what I do, and what I want to do.

Also, I have found an amazing girl, and might've been caught up in that and forgotten where I really am. I am determined to learn Korean, and not just have a loose understanding. With this, I want to try to maintain this and try to write in Korean small entries when I can.

Smooth sailing.

On a dawned horizon

Things are gonna change in the last measure of enlightenment. That's the biggest thing about having nothing change at all. It leaves a feeling of near-empty silence that allows for expansion into realms, paradigms, and even towns beyond.

My travels are nearly on the eve of tomorrow, and I'm learning to enjoy the simple time in-between. The quiet hours of myself where I can perceive the ancient wei wu-wei of my favorite person. It's poetic in it's non-poetic nature, it's significant in its insignificant, and it's majestic in its sloppiness.

However, in practical terms there is still the work to be done, and I look forward to this as well. There is a plan that has begun to brew in me for an additional major in International Business. I would probably have to stay an extra year in school, but I believe that I would firstly, enjoy it, and secondly, greatly benefit from it. That's all in another time and place to now though.

For now, there is only a day in this town.

having only text and no images leaves more to the imagination and less to the happenstance occurance that the sudden aesthetic onslaught of buety will captivate anyone and everyone whom is worthy of such an event. But, is any of that worth anything if there is nothing. The risen, the expansion, the emancipation, or the transliteration; they all yeild a result. Is that all that can be said. Surely that is what seems to be the case with all the absences and escapes that are everday occurance.... Nah, it's time to keep goin!

A Variation

   After taking an online test and spending hours trying to make my computer perfect to my taste, I have come to realize some things.  The biggest thing being that the more awesome software I put on the more software I end up taking off towards the end of my frantic optimization.  In relation to the test though, it's entirely too easy to not give a damn about on line classes, but that's why people take them in the first place I guess.

  Also, after some contemplation, I think I will use this blog as a means to let my folks know what I'm up to while I'm in Korea.  It'll be a good way to give me a reason to actually write stuff, and it let them feel better knowing what I'm doing.

On The Road

  I return home after an extended extension in Tampa.  The past week was pretty crazy, and I must say I miss it.  Starting with bringing back the two Harukas back to Tampa and then rolling into evenings with my friends family and days wasting time at USF.  A childish effort to be practical and sign up for gen-eds left me feeling like a drain on my family, and two parties.  One with old friends another with completely new.

  So, I must say that the slower pace of home is all too humbling on the heels of a year in Korea, especially with the new knowledge of it pretty much paying for itself.  The Korean government is apparently looking for anyone to teach English there.  Lucky me?  But I'm getting nowhere quickly, time for more exciting things.

  Parents from the 60's era are hilariously predictable.  Hearing about the "revolution" from a drunk father is nothing short of hysterical.  A drunk man crying for his girlfriend gives me mixed emotions of loneliness and pity.  Random strangers that end up feeling like old friends make good roommates when you need a place to sleep.  Returning home to a family that misses and loves you is a bitter-sweet situation that leaves no one perfectly happy.

  No more boring stories, but I need to find ways to excuse going back up to Tampa, and decide if a girl should be pursued.  Summer classes should be taken care of quickly, but I feel bitterly toward them.  Still, I love the road and I have a lot to look forward to.

  I think I'll just take this thing a day at a time for now.